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When griping grief the heart doth wound,
and doleful dumps the mind opresses,
then music, with her silver sound,
with speedy help doth lend redress.
-William Shakespeare
17 til I die
There's something different about me now as I'm typing this... oh how I dread to say it, but yeah... I'm 18. Crap. Doesn't feel very wonderful at all. Hahah. Always 17 at heart though... always 17 at heart *beats chests with clenched fists*
Bunking in at Yong Jie's house right now with a few of the guys. Leaving for Genting later and looking forward to it all. Where the fun is, we'll be there... you can count on it. And then Survivor Camp right after ? People talking me into going for it. Wonder how I'm going to actually survive the Survivor camp. Talk about irony. Hahah. I'll probably need a first-aider for myself.
Oh and yet again, "mr. cute" is safe in Singapore Idol for another week. Why Nurul ? She CAN actually sing... and she's cute too. (get Jasmine out please). I realised I actually LOVE malay songs. I loved Belaian Jiwa... Taufik did it the last time. And now the ones Hady and Nurul did were excellent man. Especially Hady's one. He should win it.
Am I glad the exams are over and done with. Since aunty's desperately insisting I blog about her, I shan't. But come to think of it, by blogging about not wanting to blog about aunty because she wants to be blogged about, is already blogging about her... hmm. Nevermind. Hahah. I had a great dinner with her right after my last paper, and it was a great time aunty !! Looking forward to more of those. I had some time with Josel too yesterday for lunch. It was good times too. Always wonderful to be spending time sharing with one another and encouraging each other along, though most of the times nonsensical chatter and laughter cloud the conversations.
Thanks to those who sent those birthday wishes. Really appreciate all of them. Never actually had so many people wishing me happy birthday for all the birthdays I had before. Hahah. I just pray my classmates won't do anything "nice" to me later in the day. Especially at Genting in the hotel rooms at night. Tread carefully and I'll be fine... give me a peaceful birthday please. No tau pok, no stripping, no bashing, and definitely NO TICKLING ME. I'll just scream. Thanks.
I love You Jesus. Thank You for always protecting me, guarding me under the shadow of Your wings. Nothing can snatch me away from the palms of Your hands. Though I can't see it, I know the battles You have with the Enemy. It's real... it's chaotic... it's ugly. Every drip of blood You pour over me protects me against the very fingers the Enemy tries to lay on me. I thank You Jesus, and I want You to continue to be always fighting for me, guarding my heart and my soul. I give You my all.
It's way too "early" in the morning, and I'm going to get some rest.
Much love to all.
Peace.
signing off at 3:04 AM
Star-struck
Okay, I think it doesn't take a fool to realize that Singaporeans just simply do not know how to vote properly in a certain "singing" competition. Notice I'm not even sure if it's a "singing" competition anymore.
Goodness... does it really mean that "performing monkey" can sing better than Rahimah and Mathilda ? What's the world, or rather, Singapore coming to !? I can't understand what's so "cute" about this guy that girls are going crazy over him, pouring out their votes on him. How come he doesn't get hate-mail and threats like Jerry last time around when he obviously can't prove he's good enough for the competition ? Okay I shan't be mean and say he can't sing for nuts (but it's obvious he can't), but definitely he is in no way in the same league as the other contestants, more so the ones who got ousted out.
Hady Mirza please you gotta win this man !! All the way bro. Behind you always, but I won't be voting, coz I can't see myself wasting the money and votes... I'm a typical Singaporean you see... eh... so I see !! No wonder the competition's screwed up !! It's not the way Singaporeans vote, but the way Singaporeans DON'T vote. I've not been voting but I've been complaining... the irony of it all. HAHAH !!
I'm still so not gonna vote...
I kinda like this.
August baby -
Outgoing personality. takes risks. feeds on attention. No self-control. Kind hearted. Self-confident. Loud and boisterous. VERY revengeful. Easy to get along with and talk to. Has an "every thing's peachy" attitude. Likes talking and singing. Loves music. Daydreamer.Easily distracted. Hates not being trusted. BIG imagination. Loves to be loved. Hates studying. in need of "that someone". Longs for freedom. Rebellious when withheld or restricted. Lives by "no pain no gain" caring.Always a suspect. Playful. Mysterious. "charming" or "beautiful" to everyone. stubborn. curious. Independent Strong willed. A fighter.
I'd say that's about 60% true.
But the name I'm seeking is more than just these. Only God can show me my name. The man he created inside of me and planned for.
3 down, 2 more papers to go. I wanna start burning all my module notes and tutorials... just for kicks. Oh I'm so in need of my precious sleep. Love it and missing it.
So looking forward to the holidays... gonna embrace it real tight. Looking forward to the Genting trip with my classmates !! Great to be in a class that's bonded as a whole. I thank God so much for this class of friends.
I've got a Saviour that is living in me
And the world will never take,
The world will never take You away
signing off at 11:15 PM
Mighty to Save
Will you give me that strange look if I say I love my country ? I've said it before, and yeah I do love my country. God put me here for a reason and I'm so blessed to be where I am. There's no place in the world like this... BUT... I know my God will never limit me to this space. And that is my dream to travel round the world, to the ends of the earth, to bring people to God or closer to God. Just wait and see, cause my God is big. In my heart though, Singapore will always be home.
FOP this year felt different. CCC Worship Band was over the top... lose myself in worship and praise for God... it was great. Some of my friends walked away in disgust when they came on. Hahah. (Why Joel !?!) Their songs just get stuck in your head. "Great is our God... Oye Oye Oye !!"
Exams are coming and I need need need to study... but I can't even sit still for an hour for crying out loud. Someone really ought to point a gun at my head... hmm maybe that won't even help. Argh just shoot me in the leg, I'll probably then start to obediently study while weeping in pain.
I want to give glory to God because recently, I'm beginning to realize how God provides and takes care of my needs. Not exactly in the best of... money times... always striving on what I have. My eldest brother's the one providing me with pocket money nowadays, and I can't expect too much from him. Constantly nagging about how useless I am, laying around at home and not getting a job to earn my own pocket money. I wish I needn't live off him and provide for myself, but I can't let anything get in the way of my studies and more importantly, my service for God. Definitely these things will suffer a great deal if I had to work at the same time. When I tell him I'm too busy with my Christian CCA in school, I get the look. You know that look. The one that says "Goodness me, Christian nonsense. *Rolls eyeballs, smacks palm onto forehead*"
But God is good. Everytime I see my money slowly diminishing to zero, I start to worry about where's the money going to come from, or how I'm going to ask for it. I really hate asking money from my Dad, and more still my brother. Everytime they ask if I need cash, I'd say no when in actual fact, I do. But the money's coming from everywhere !! Just recently I was left with little money to survive... then almost all at the same time, God used people to provide me with the necessities. My god-dad gave me 50 bucks and on the following day, my brother transfered another 50 to my account. And just today, my cousin gave me 50 bucks. The most unusual source of money I must say !! I couldn't accept the money from my cousin but he told me to take it coz my dad often gave him cash when he was young. OKAY LOR. The best thing is that the money's coming in bits from different people, rather than having a main ATM providing the bulk of the money.
And eh... if anyone's looking for a tuition teacher... call me. I want your money.
Saviour, He can move the mountains
My God is mighty to save
He is mighty to save
signing off at 12:05 AM
My shooting star
I went for my midnight jog on saturday night and it was great. Been a while since I did that... but the most amazing thing happened. As I lay down on the playground looking at the stars in the open, I saw a shooting star !! No bullshit. It swept across the sky with a brightly golden lit trail. Just for that second it appeared after I prayed to God. I still can't believe I saw an actual shooting star... it's not everyday that you get to see one. It made me smile really. I saw the finger of God drew across the night sky.
I've been fighting and I reckon I'm doing fine. It may not be what I wanted but God will set my heart right. Align me to His heartbeat, that's what I desire. More than anything, I'm ready to throw off the ropes that held me. By the grace of God my cup will be filled and it will overflow. I'm winning the slow and long fight, moulded and changed each step. A holy instrument that will glorify You... You are more than enough for me.
I know I'm very suah-gu... but I still can't believe I saw a shooting star.
signing off at 12:03 AM
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Ian, 21
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