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When griping grief the heart doth wound,
and doleful dumps the mind opresses,
then music, with her silver sound,
with speedy help doth lend redress.
-William Shakespeare
Shadowfeet
I'm either a little not myself right now... or really just being a little too much of myself. Either way... there's inner gravity that's drawing the deep spirit within me. There always seem to have a time that comes around... a time when we require ourselves to be locked up to the solitude devouring our hearts somehow...
I'm pretty much lost to certain things right now. It's a toss up between what's right and what's wrong. Seeing things from a different angle and perspective often brings a whole new light of reasons and truths. Seemingly sometimes, you're stuck in a decision to force your eyes to look at things from a certain way you never would... just so you could achieve greater control.
But in all honesty and wisdom... simplicity is complicated in itself, and complication has simplicity in it. The human mind exceeds all things that measures, all things that claim to understand.
On a lighter note, I found the past week to be one that's most fulfilling and meaningful. I spent the entire week meeting up with freshmen over lunch and drinks. I don't know what it is but it brings about a spirit of thanksgiving and being there to hear and see invokes heaps of encouragement to the soul. This was one week where I was intentional in my meetings and in my fellowships... I felt like I've challenged, not just about service, but more importantly bearing a bigger heart for God and chasing, pursuing a vision. I've given them a goal to work towards to... set their hearts towards greater things... it purely felt like I discipled.
There is so much joy in that... and I told God if I could, I'd do that the rest of my life. That's what I'm chasing, that's what I'm pursuing. God intends to change lives... lives that will take a stand, make a difference and impact other lives... and I want to be part of that somewhere.
Everything I once held dear, I count it all as loss. That I may gain Christ over all things in heaven and on earth. I worry not my future anymore... for that belongs to Christ.
I live in the risen Son
signing off at 1:46 AM
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Ian, 21
iancll@hotmail.com
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